Hospital Show | Chapter 9: Kiss Her

[Rosanna over mic]
It looks like you came down with a case of
droopy-boob syndrome. Droopy? And just because you’re
scrutinized does not mean
you’re not respected. Well, no, Rosanna, but it’s
the method of scrutiny– [vomiting] What the f—
is with this thing? If I stay, that man will be my boyfriend
for the next five years. -Well, only in the day.
-If not this, what would you do? -I’d go back to med school…
-What? …and then I’d go
and work in Africa. I’ll come to Africa with you.
Let’s… let’s jump. Nobody’s jumping anywhere. -‘Cause you’re a pussy.
-Shut up. Pussy, pussy, pussy,
pussy, pussy! Oh! Hey… So, you want to be
a real doctor. [♪♪♪] ♪ Everybody
Everybody ♪ ♪ Everybody’s on TV ♪ I’ve looked at
your volunteer clinic hours. Very impressive. Oh, yeah, a clinic
on the East Side, I volunteer there in the… In the summer. [sighing] Listen, Charlie. I don’t think this is for you. I think it might be. I just didn’t have the drive to push through med school
and finish. [Richardson] Right. After the eight
to 11 years it takes to become a doctor… I know, you’ve got
a bit of a head start… you’ll be working an average
of 58 hours a week. You give up your life. I already have no life.
I work 60 hours a week. You’ll be depressed, too. I’m already depressed. More depressed. Almost 400 doctors a year
kill themselves. Wow. That was really convincing. You nailed that line. What’s your real name? Barry. Barry… are you
a background performer? Yes. Usually in Radiology. That’s right.
Assistant Radiologist. Okay, Barry from Radiology. I’m going to get you
a speaking part. Thank you! Thank you so much. No problem, Barry.
You’re very good. Sorry. [chuckling] Mmm, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that’s good. Sorry about that water
back there. Ah, no problem,
Number Two. Damn, you look good in that. Looks great on you. [Charlie] Oh, I’m good. [Rich] Ham-bur-ger. Doc-tor. Mint, thank you.
Thanks. Absolutely. [camera assistant]
42, take one. Mark. So, uh, friends? Hmm? Is that it,
we’re just friends? Or are we something else? You tell me. Okay. [♪♪♪] Does this say
“something else” to you? [Rich breathing heavily] [Charlie] Mmm… Stop! [Paul]
Okay, that was, uh… -[camera assistant] Mark.
-[mints rattling] Does this say
“something else” to you? Mm! Mmm! Arr! Does this say
“something else” to you? -[spluttering]
-[Paul] Cut! [Rich] Ah, ah, ah, ah! [Lisa] Good. Whoo! -I’m good.
-Ah! [♪♪♪] Get your fingers
out of her mouth, Rich! -Cut!
-Sorry. Dude… [♪♪♪] What the f— are you doing? What the f—?! [Rosanna] Kiss her, Rich! [Paul] Cut! Ah… Number One.
Number One. [Paul] Okay,
very sexy and in love. [Rosanna] Yeah, good.
Very good. Okay, now, amp it up. [♪♪♪] Mmm… baby, baby. -[Rosanna] Oh, yeah. Ooh, yes.
– That’s it! [Rosanna] Okay, hey, wait,
why are you stopping? Charlie, what…
was that too much? [Rosanna] Charlie, we got it.
Moving on. It’s good. -No, none of this is good.
-It is good, I’m telling you! -What did I miss?
-Your mom’s real pissed. -Well, it’s not good for me!
-Ooh, this is gonna be good. Kill me in the train wreck,
Rosanna! Oh, you wanna die,
is that it? Yes! Please! Kill me. I dare you! Don’t tempt me!
I’ll do it! Do it, you bitch on a stick! What did you just call me?! I quit! Oh, go, then.
See if I care, Charlie. Hey, you get on this train,
you’re not getting off. Most likely. Actually, you could
probably come back. Forget I said anything. Kaitlin, let’s go. -[Rich] Charlie! Charlie!
– [Rosanna] There she goes! Let her go! Let her go. I shouldn’t even be here! I’m supposed to be playing golf
for a good cause today. But since you people
can’t stick to a schedule, what you’re saying
is “screw Rich’s schedule!” “Screw you, Rich,
and screw autistic kids!” [Kaitlin]
Obviously it’s what you want. Didn’t think you had
the guts to quit. [Charlie] Where the hell… Are you congratulating me? Vince, give me your phone. [Vince] Fine. [Astrid] That was brave.
I’ll miss you. Thanks, you guys. Where the hell
is the way out? [gasping passionately] [shrieks of surprise]
Oh! Whoa! Okay, rehearsal
of Heimlich Maneuver. -Can you close the door?
-Sorry, we were just trying to cut through to the…
-Yeah. Never mind. All right, give it to me,
Doctor Barry. -[screaming]
-That’s not Best Boy Peter. Hi, Barry. [Barry] Hi. So, Peter said
he wanted a buffet, but what was that, an orgy? No, Peter wanted a girlfriend. He wanted a buffet of snuggles
and cuddles and sleepovers and hand-holding. A buffet of affection?
Huh. Sweet. No, basically more commitment. Right.
Right, this is Patient Room 3. There’s an accident victim arriving here
later this afternoon, so just leave everything
the way it was before you come…
Came! In. Today. Why do I care? Charlie quit. What? You can watch it later
on my feed. Sorry, Barry. Oh! Ooh!
-Ouch! [Rosanna] I want you to think
very carefully now. You can take it all back. I’m not apologizing. You should kill me
on the train, Rosanna… [Rosanna] I don’t want
to kill you on the train! Then make it a fire. -You quit?
-Where’s Barry? -He’s resting.
-Oh. You were right about me
the first day we met, Rosanna. I don’t have
the skin for this. Get a thicker skin. ‘Cause I know that
there is a part of you that wants to stay. Well, that’s a no-brainer! This is my life.
These are my people! You’re my life, too, Charlie! Uh, thanks, Rich. And my life.
Seriously, I like it here. Her life, too. And maybe I’m supposed to stay
and figure things out, but you know what,
I can’t do it! I’m done! I’m jumping. Rosanna? Rosanna! It’s Will!
He’s-he’s in your office. What the f—‘s he doing
in there? [Nancy] It’s an emergency.
He’s out of control. [Kaitlin] What’s going on?
Is he okay? Report to the trailer.
Code Red, people. [Vince] Can I have
my phone back? Thank you. [Paul]
Can we have a 20 on the cast? -What’s going on?
-It’s a 10-1. -Will’s in trouble.
-10-1. -They’re all in the bathroom?
– Yeah, all of them. [♪♪♪] ♪ And now
we’re lining up to see ♪ ♪ The movie of our vanity ♪ ♪ Who needs a life to lead ♪ ♪ When you can watch it all
for free ♪ ♪ Everybody
Everybody ♪ ♪ Everybody’s on TV ♪ ♪ Everybody
Everybody ♪ ♪ Everybody’s on TV ♪

8 thoughts on “Hospital Show | Chapter 9: Kiss Her

  1. Absolutely love how crazy and funny it is. Not going to lie it's so weird seeing Alivin doing a smut scene. So used to seeing him being holesome. But I love it. It's wacky and crazy like riverdale. I love it

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