Doctor Reacts to: WILD MEDICAL MEMES EP. 3

– You’ll soon be at peace. Man: I’m dying? No, your wife is. (laughing) That is messed up, man! (electronic music) Memes are a great way to waste time, and a little procrastination
never hurt anybody. Bee-whoop! Doctor: what do you see? Her: A virgin in his forties. (laughing) Okay, get out. And the girl’s so smiley in the picture. It makes it even better. A classic Franklin story. Franklin fakes an injury
to get Percocet. (laughing) I hope Franklin isn’t doing that because then he’s gonna be
part of the opioid epidemic. Franklin, shape up. When you’re talking about
class with your friends and your non-med school friend
is sitting there like… You know, that’s funny,
whenever I try and talk to my friends about med
school and it gets deep, they just tell me right
away, they’re like, “Mike, nobody wants to hear this.” Mom: He’s about to go viral any day now. You started an Instagram for him? I didn’t vaccinate him. (laughing) I got the black lung, Pop. Your throat is sore and swollen? These giant unswallowable horse pills should clear that right up. I have to constantly remind myself that a five-year-old or a seven-year-old cannot swallow these mega horse pills. But I’m gonna give you
a strategy right now on how to swallow large pills. You ready? You take the pill. You put it on your tongue. Take a water bottle, preferably one that’s three
quarters of the way full. Tilt it up and then suck in so that the water bottle crumples
a little bit, and swallow. You won’t even feel the pill going down. Polio, hepatitis, tetanus breaking in, and then you have like a
little essential oil Cheeto or Dorito or whatever
that is holding the door. Essential oils. What are you doing? Polio has a rod in your Cheeto! Food falls, bacteria after five seconds: it’s free real estate. Bacteria don’t hang out and go
wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Chills, bros, gotta give it a few seconds. No, they just hop right on. Doctor: what brings you here today? Me: my car, ha ha. Doctor, writing in chart:
“not sexually active” (laughs) When you’re ready to
memorize the entire semester in 12 hours. (laughs) Yo, this was me, it’s Thursday. My test is on Monday,
and I’m just sit down. I have Broxy sitting below me and she’s just looking up at me, waiting for me to take her out ’cause she just loves
to play all the time, and I’m like, “No. I have
to watch these lectures.” And I would go, in one day, watch two weeks of lectures,
just bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. Then Friday, again,
watch all the lectures. Bam, bam, bam. Then Saturday and Sunday,
practice questions, practice questions, practice questions. And then come in Monday;
do well on the test. Doctors told this man that
he had only one year to live. He worked hard and proved them wrong. He died in two months. (laughing) That’s messed up. T-Pain full name; Tylenol Painrelief. If that’s really his
name, that’s really funny. I know it’s not his name. Taking a test: 12, C, 13, C, 14, C, 15, C. Me: Well, one of these gotta be wrong. Oh my God, when I saw a few
in a row that were C or B, I would be having a panic attack and I would go back to
try and change one of them and I wish I didn’t do that. Your first gut instinct
is usually the right one. I have bad news, and worse news. The bad news is you have 24 hours to live, And the worst news? I meant to tell you yesterday. (laughs) 2009, 2019 ten year challenge. (laughs) Oh, that’s so good. It has all these carbs in 2009, and then insulin in 2019
because you became a diabetic in ten years from maxing out on the carbs. Refined carbs are evil, people. All right, I’m gonna get off my high horse because I love cookies
and cream milkshakes. Master P out here looking
like a mitochondria. He kind of does look like a mitochondria. Doctor: Why did you take
your antibiotic at 6am, when I told you 9am? By the way, that happens. I wanted to surprise the bacteria. I think the picture
makes this meme better, because the guy’s just like You don’t surprise bacteria. They surprise you. Me: I’m so scared for this exam. Also me: (laughs) There’s something powerful when you’re nervous about an exam, and you act naughty and not
study and watch Netflix instead it feels good for some reason, I don’t even know where
that goodness comes from. When you gotta straight
jacket the Med student so he don’t touch your sterile field. (laughs) I’m not gonna lie, when I was
going into my first surgeries, I did touch the sterile field, or at least come close to
touching the sterile field and I got yelled at. I probably could have benefited from one of these straight jackets myself. That one molecule of
serotonin trying to keep me going throughout the day. (laughs) I like this one. Serotonin is what you
get inside of the brain that helps elevate your
mood along with dopamine. If you connect the measles, it spells out, “My parents are idiots.” (laughs) Anti-vax people, what are you doing? Come on Facebook, just forty more likes and I can save that
little girl’s… (laughs) People always make fun of me like, “Do you think you took that selfie while the patient was dying?” No I didn’t take the selfie
while someone was dying. It takes ten seconds to take a selfie or for someone to take a picture of you. How I felt when I was in high school. Albert Einstein. How I feel being in Med school, (laughs) Planet of the Apes. It’s easier to do well in a small town, in a small school because there’s less people to compete against. Then you go to a med school, or you go to a competitive
university like Harvard and all of a sudden you’re
surrounded by people who are all brilliant, and who were all killing it in high school,
that can be really stressful. And its important to not consistently look at what others are doing
and how they’re performing, and judge yourself based on that. She’s suffering from Appendicitis. (laughs) That’s really funny. I wonder who that model is. Family medicine doctors
describing their salary. It’s ain’t much, but it’s honest work. Pretty much all of
primary care belongs here, pediatrics, psychiatry, family medicine. Lady: am I okay? Paramedic: it’s just
a scratch on your leg. Lady: let me see. The leg is in the other ambulance. (laughs) Oh! Want the good news or bad news first? Good news please doctor. Well they’re naming a
disease after you. (laughs) I wonder what the bad news is. Dogs can’t operate MRI machines. But cats can. Meow! Girl: Why don’t we get vaccines? Dad: Honey why would we trust doctors when we can trust the internet? Boy: I miss my brother. Girl: My blood hurts. (laughs) Anti-vaxers are gonna destroy
my channel after this. Me when my classmates are
talking about their answers after the exam. I was the worst when it came to this. No joke, after the test, I would run up to my classmates
who were in my BSDO program and I’d be like, “What did you get for the
one that was about this? What did you get for the
one that was about this? What did you put for the–” And everyone was like,
“Mike you’re so annoying, we just want to relax, leave us alone.” Don’t worry buddy, I’ve
got some essential oils doing their work. Hells ya bruh, that
lavender oil is kickin’ in. That’s (squeaking noise) fire. I swear to god the essential oil community and the naturopaths are coming to get me. Doctor: The disease is gone. Her: So my son is gonna be okay? I just told you he’s gone. (laughs) Oh my god these things just get
worse and meaner and meaner. Why can’t we just create
funny memes that are just, ya know, happy and uplifting? How does the– the most evil thing ever. Doctor: These tests show great health. Nice. They’re not yours, you’re barely alive. The cockiest hospital I have ever seen. Ooh, I like this hospital. You know this is a good
time to bring this up. You know this staff, that’s
supposed to represent medicine and doctors? That’s the symbol of gamblers, robbers, and thieves or something. It has nothing to do with medicine. We’ve misinterpreted the use. The correct is one staff with
the snake going around it. Using the opthalmoscope for
the first time feels like. (laughs) Oh my god, ophthalmoscope
is that thing that we use to do a fundoscopic exam. What you’re supposed to learn, and if you didn’t know this, is if you’re looking at
the patient’s left eye, as a doctor you should be
using your right eye to look, So that you’re not making
out or touching eyes. And then when you’re
checking their right eye, you should be using your left eye. And I’ve seen doctors mess that up, where they’re looking at their left eye, and the doctor’s using their left eye, and they’re almost kissing the patient. Oh, that’s the awkward. Doctor: You remind me of my cell phone. Woman: How? Because you’re about to die. (laughs) Oh my god. Can’t even charge her. If you enjoyed this video, you’re definitely gonna love this one, click here now, and
stay happy and healthy. But click here. (upbeat electronic music)

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